Well, we had a fun day today.  It was just what I needed.  We are hosting a homeschool co-op study on the Symbols of Christmas.  Dawn did most of the work.  Thanks, Dawn!!!  The kids are doing this lapbook from In the Hands of a Child. Even the littles got involved in the cutting and pasting.

The other moms and I so enjoyed the fellowship, and after some discussion on food issues (healthy, acceptable to kids, etc.), we’re thinking of doing some cooking together as well. After Christmas we’ll be starting another lapbook as well as doing a library day together. It does me a world of good to have the interaction. And to know others are going through such similar situations as wives, moms, and women in general.

And then after everyone was gone, and I had a chance to sit down and read some blogs, I was delighted to see this link from Rhen at Yes, They Are All Mine. 

Tomorrow is the first day of Advent, according to the twenty-five day calendar, though I’d like to do a Jesse Tree as well. It takes twenty-nine days I believe. I would love to make the ornaments from this site for next year. I’m going to try to at least get out my roughly-made felt advent calendar tomorrow. It’s not professional, but we like it. It’s a manger scene, with twenty-four pockets, and Baby Jesus moves from pocket to pocket until Dec. 25th, when He gets to lay in the manger.

Do you have your tree up yet?

I’ve been scarce, I know.  I had a bit (my family would probably say *huge*) of a meltdown on the weekend as a result of several factors, and it’s taken me a few days to get back to normal.  Uh, semi-normal?  Ok, back to being able to function well.  Let’s just say Cole said it well this morning, when after calling him upstairs to have a chat with him about our plans for the day, he said, “You seem happy today, Mom.”  Oh, my pride….

So there are a few things I wanted to mention.  First of all, thanks again to Michelle at Scribbit for hosting the writing contest. I enjoyed the challenge (I haven’t done much writing in years, though I did a LOT of it in high school), and am looking forward to another one. Congratulations to the winner. For a chance to see some good writing, check here.

Also, I put my name in on a few of the offerings during the Fall Y’all Bloggy Giveaway. I didn’t expect to win, really with so many people entering. But it was fun to try. I didn’t have time to go through the more than 600 entrants, so I just selected a few (maybe 20 or so). Well, I was blessed to win, not once, but twice. I won a fun Acrylix stamp set from Kyleen. And from Nikki I won a cute weather bear for Brett. Brett has been feeling a bit left out on the “school” front, so it was great to have something come in the mail that was for him.  He is quite pleased with it.  I’m too lazy tired to even try to look up the link for the Fall Y’all Giveaway page, and I still haven’t found my camera cord, so I can’t empty my memory card so I can take pics of my prizes.  I am very greatful for them, though.  Thanks, Ladies!

That is it for now.  I’m afraid blogging may be more sporadic over the next month or so.  I’m still struggling to want to do Christmas this year, and instead am spending my spare time looking at ideas for a mid-winter vacation to somewhere warm.  I’m not sure it will happen, but it’s fun to think about. 

Take care.  And thanks for any and all comments.  It’s fun to see new people dropping in. 

There was a girl.  A girl with lots of energy.  Then the girl grew up.  The girl had babies.  Lots of babies.  And not so much energy.  The girl thought one day, “I would really like to have a whole week of sleeping in and napping.  Well, okay, maybe I could handle just a couple of days with a couple of naps.  Then I could have lots of energy again.  To take care of all the babies.  Who have lots of energy.”  Someday the girl will have lots of naps, and lots of energy, and no babies.  And the girl will be sad.  So the girl will keep missing naps and energy in exchange for being with her babies.  And the girl will be happy.

 The end.

Michelle at Scribbit is a hosting a writing contest. You still have a couple of days to join in for a chance to win, or if you don’t meet the deadline, you can still send her a blog entry that she will post with all the other entries on November 23.

It began many months ago.  One after the other, the painful circumstances bombarded her time and time again.  Feeling the heartache of desperation, even as the life growing within her womb ebbed away, she knew that the road ahead could be such a long one.  How does one recover from such a loss?  The guilt of being a mother, unable to save her child, though yet unborn, was huge.  Maybe she shouldn’t have….Ah, but they all told her there was nothing to be done.  Before or after, it wasn’t her fault.  It was just “one of those things.”

Moving ahead in life, the next few weeks were very busy.  A new home, a new community.  Life graciously gave her something to which she could put her hand - and mind.  But the heaviness lay deep inside.  Once she returned home, life went back to normal for those around her.  She knew they cared in their own way, but the ackwardness of not knowing what to say kept them from saying anything at all.  So the pain was neatly tucked away in a room deep inside her heart, where she would visit when she was alone. 

Do not misunderstand: she was happy.  The joy of her other children, the love of her husband, and her faith in God carried her.  She knew that one day she would understand.  She could rest in that.  She would not, however, be the same again.

As the healing was beginning, another blow.  Accusations - the kind that ripped away at the very core of who she was, and for what she lived.  The seed of fear was planted, and it took much time to conquer it.  It was hard for her to not lash out at those who would accuse, or to defend her actions.  Most of her acquaintances were unaware of the circumstances in which she found herself.  So she found herself having to pretend that things were fine, when inside she was full of confusion, fear, and shame.  Walking through this painful experience, she knew once again that life had changed.  Her normal was different.

Broken relationships, more accusations, physical hurdles, even a spiraling downward into depression….she leaned on her faith, her husband, her love for her children, and caring friends to carry her.  When it became more than she could handle, she would openly admit that she needed some light in the darkness, pain, and confusion.

It came without warning.  This little Light that has now become essential to her life.  She didn’t know it at the time that the glow began, but the beam would shine through those many dark moments, and reach deep inside her to draw out more of the very core of her being.  Things that she thought she knew about herself, but suddenly felt as strange as two individuals meeting for the very first time, came to her awareness as this Light grew.

In the midst of one of the most painful times of growth for her, the Light became so bright, that all else receded.  The shining did not occur without effort.  The Light itself had to fight alongside her, as they both knew giving up could not be an option.  It wasn’t easy, but in the end, the Light prevailed.

Now she looks back at those dark days and months, which seem covered by a haze.  The kind of haze that dullens the memories of an early-morning dream, making it hard to recall the depth of despair and pain that threatened to overtake her at times.  She hasn’t forgotten it all, but The Light has drawn her focus so much, that a deep joy has grown out of the despair.  The Light - indeed a gift straight from above, a gift that The Father knew would bring healing - continues to grow.  And it continues to bring growth to her own life. 

The Light requires care.  It is not self-sufficient.  Rather, they depend on each other.  And on all those around them.  They exist together, sustaining and growing and living.  Neither content to simply exist, but to thrive.

Where is she now?  She is here.  I am she.  I will never be the same after the year and some months that have passed.  I have faced many difficulties and painful experiences in times past, but this past season of my life has challenged me to a much greater degree.  I wasn’t sure how I would make it at one point.  But this I do know: my Heavenly Father saw fit to allow the flame of life to keep burning, as it grew in me.  He gave me my own Light, to help guide me through the weariness.  When I wasn’t even sure I’d be able to smile again, the Light shone straight into my eyes, and I found myself smiling through the tears.

To this Light I can only say thank you.  Thank you for coming into my life.  You have been the most amazing gift.  You have shone through a very dark and difficult season for me.  This season has indeed changed me, but your presence in my life, even your need of me, has changed me forever.  In spite of my struggles, you kept shining.  I will never be the same. 

Damara Greer, I love you forever.

We have conquered it!  Mount Garage is now a molehill.  A tidy, non-smelly, molehill.  And it’s nicely housing our trampoline and treadmill for some mid-winter “gym classes”.  You know, when it’s so nasty a polar bear wears a parka.  The kids love being able to throw on some shoes and run out there.  We’re thinking we’ll also put out our play carpenter’s bench and kitchen, so they have other things to amuse themselves with, while giving Mommy a bit of a break from their noise. 

About the treadmill, did I mention that we got one?  For free?  It was on the side of the road.  It’s not perfect, as it seems to have some kind of a phobia about anyone holding the bars, and then slows down to almost a stop, but if you have good balance, and can walk without the assistance of the bars, it’s fine.  Greg seems to need to keep it on a slope, so I’m thinking it has something to do with his weight.  Anyway, I’ve been really unhappy with my weight, and lack of exercise, and not-lack of food - the combination is not making me feel good at all.  I am sooo out of shape.  I still don’t know how much or what kind of exercises are ok with the diastasis, so I’ll be asking the dr. about that at Damara’s appointment on Tuesday.  I’m putting some thought into what meals I can eat, how to reduce my intake, drinking more water….really just trying to deal with this before it gets worse.  I am tired all the time, struggle to have energy to do the most basic housework, easily winded, very weak….*sigh*  I feel old before my time.

Anyway, it does feel good to finally have the garage under control.  Onward and upward!

I have a confession:  I read dictionaries….for fun.  I LOVE words.  My favourite movie is Pride & Prejudice.  Yes, I do enjoy the storyline, the costumes, and the scenery.  But I am totally captivated by the language!  I find myself quoting it more and more.  The use of the English language on this particular movie is so amazing, and then there’s my, and my general acquaintances’, use of the English language.  Kind of like comparing a menu consisting of dishes by the top chefs of the world to the $1.39 menu from Wendy’s.  Adequate, but that’s all (Add to that the fact that I spend most of my waking hours with five children under eight, and I hear myself saying, more often than I’m happy to admit, words like boogers, poop, and owies.  A compound sentence for me most likely sounds like this, “Luke, stop pulling the dog’s tail, and Brett, would you please go put some clothes on?!).  Do I speak English?  “Aye, and very ill, indeed!”

So you can imagine that when something like this shows up, I’m going to be checking the site out more than once. I think it’s fantastic that they are tackling two big issues - literacy and world hunger - in such a manner.

Now I have to go figure out how many grains of rice fit into one eight ounce cup….

In an attempt to jump-start my very dormant Christmas Spirit, I am starting by changing my blog look.  I know that for any Americans this may seem premature, as you are in the midst of Thanksgiving celebrations.  However, we Canadians, in the true spirit of individuality, have our Thanksgiving way back in October.  So for us, the Christmas decor begins making it’s appearance any time after Nov.1.  Though the occasional crazy person  cheerfully festive individual will go so far as to deck the halls in late October. 

I am feeling like a Scrooge this year, and if it weren’t for the kids, or the fact that we are hosting Christmas dinner for at least eight adults and nine children, I would skip the whole holiday entirely.  I have not yet bought one.single.gift.  Bah….I won’t say the rest.  I’ve been playing Christmas music in an attempt to get myself motivated to decorate.  I love to decorate my house, especially for Christmas.  But this year, my heart isn’t in it.  I joined BooMama’s Christmas Bloggy Tour with the hopes that maybe a deadline would get my decorative juices flowing.  So far, I haven’t even managed to keep the house clean for more than two hours, let alone long enough to decorate. 

 Maybe today.  I’m going to tidy up our main area (open concept kitchen/living/dining), then when Hubs gets home from his weekly Christian men’s breakfast, we’re going to continue the quest to conquer Mount Garage, in which our heroes will finally attack the summit, having conquered the bottom half of Mount Garage last Monday.  And maybe, just maybe, I’ll convince him that today is a great day to string up some lights, and hang a few wreaths. 

Or not. 

Rhen, at Yes, They Are All Mine, is hosting a giveaway. A great book by Charles Stanley is encouraging me to join in. Why don’t you visit her, and leave a comment to be entered for a chance to win.